5/2/11
Tell me what it is that i'm suppose to feel. Tell me what it is that i'm suppose to hear. Tell me what is it that i'm doing here. Tell me why is it that I feel the way I feel. This cant be real. This cant be true. Listen to when the fuck I cry out to you. .....'Listen To My Cry'......
since day one ive been playing the same old song ... the song that tends to tell the story of how Life is bringing me harm ... can no longer take the pain in which your invoking on me ... damn nigga dont you see this shit is killing me ... it been a minute since i came at you through lyrics ... im shedding tears as i write this .. cause i no longer want to feel it ... its deeper than my control ... no longer can i take hold ... the torture it put on me .... damn man the fucking misery ... why the fuck do you do this to me ... no longer know what to say ... no longer know how to walk the way ... i try to stand strong .. but i cant forget how the world did me wrong ..... tears fill my eyes as i try no write ... today i truly cried out and allowed the emotions to rise ... i'm in pain ... damn man ... i'm in fuckin pain ... surrounded by souls for so many years ... they cant even see that i'm living behind tears ..... whut type of love been offered in this world ....its driving me insane ... dont no one comprehend ... i hate'm .. i really fucking hate'm .... why the fuck you wanna know me ... let me fucking be ... fuck ya'll muthafuckahs attempting to slow down my victory .... shoulda never took that step back .... i'm on the verge of wanting to kill ... tired of people talkng shit ... trust ... ya'll dont want me to keep it real .... i dont want a part of this world .. i never asked to be here ... if it wasnt for my seeds and me having to provide them with what it is they need .... Lord knows where it is that i would rather be .... for my mind sake ...set me along the way ... cause as of today .. i fell short .... i held on strong ... more than five months strong ... dont know where i went wrong .... can no longer do this on my own ... Lord Father God .... please take me home
Fighting pain within is one of the hardest thing that i've been faced with. Instead of it getting easier, i dig myself into situations that makes the matter even deeper. One gotta learn to take control of the situation. Why is is that we recognize what it is that cause us harm yet cant seem to fix it no matter how hard you try to hold on? You may be wondering what it is that I'm going through, it's a factor of my past, present, and the fear that it'll continue on onto my future. I'm distracted at this moment, off focus, tworn up inside....no longer know how to look down the road of Life......
------Listen to My Cry .... is always only directed to God .....
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