Dark Child (Prologue)

Sleep was okay today and yesterday wasn't that bad. I'm just so happy today's Monday. I'm so happy to be going to school. You just don't understand, I'm so hungry. I didn't expect school to be like this. I dont really fit in. Technically they said I was supposed to be five to start Kindergarten, so my father lied because I was only four.

< pause and thought to myself ... seriously, as if they dont have all the paper work for the next school year and if I'm turning five this summer they would still allow me to participate in summer school ... but whatever .. test my intelligence>

The summer was a hot summer like always, for some reason my household conditions got worst I wondered if I really was their birth child. Summer came and went, regular school started. Was placed in honors then removed for not enough space. Started given trouble in my regular class, wasn't being challenged. Use to tell the teacher I was smarter, I lead the class at times, just losing interest, my parents didn't know how to deal with me .... so the abuse, neglect took it turn for the worst.

Respect

Respect ..... how do one receive it, how do one give it, when should one give it, and how should one react when they do not receive it ..... ..does maintaining respect to those who disrespect you is in a way you disrespecting yourself for continuing to tolerate the disrespect

Respect is defined as
1. To recognize the worth, quality, importance, or magnitude of
2. A feeling of deference, approval, and liking
3. Willingness to show consideration or appreciation.

Mind Games

Why is it that we, as in peopl continue to play mind games with ouselves?  We know what it is that we want yet we are cautious about the respond that may be given. So we attempt to come at the situation with such a strategic approach that only leaves oneself with more sense of hesitation because we are the only one playing the game in which two people are supposedly a part of. Confide in me then I'll confide in you. If both party is waiting on the next person to make the first move, opportunity will obviously pass them by. Yet they are aware of this and still refuse to take the necessary actions. Or is it that they hope that their thought will change and they can continue on without ever having to touch on the idea? Yet they both sort of know what the other is thinking, how the other feels, they both are hoping that they can brush off what's at hand, so why not just address the situation and find true closure. Is it because the dream is more controllable than reality although the dream is an extension of their reality......